Thursday, October 30, 2008
i realize, that recently my entries are all just pictures. i havent really been expressing much about whats going on in my life. and right now, i feel like there is a need to.im going through this mix of feelings that i dont know what to say. its so complex i dont know how to put it into words. but i'll try.
first, im sorry to you, dear. if in any way that i act pisses you off or made you uncomfortable. i didnt realize that. all i know is, im being myself. everything about me right now is myself. im not trying to impress anyone nor am i trying to get praises.. i know i have issues with my esteem. but thats me. it has been in me for years now i just cant help it. all i need is a friend to listen.. and then im okay. but i know i dont whine much to you though. cos i know you dont like to hear it.. so i share it with other gfs who whines, cries and complain to me as well. so im still kind of puzzled actually as to why u feel like that about me. like i said, i would be lying if i say that im not hurt. in fact deep down i feel a little angry. cos i find that its unfair for you to feel that way towards me. cos to me, i tried my best to be a good friend.. but its okay. its only natural for me to feel that way.. and anyway, the way you feel came from ur heart and no one can control them not even yourself.. and i know that you told me all that just to let me know what you really feel because i was the one who wanted to know. well, whats important to me now is that our friendship will still stay strong. thats all im hoping.. i love you girlfriend. xoxo
on a brighter side, i went to sentosa yesterday, AGAIN!
i just needed to chill by the beach.. lay down.. enjoy the breeze, not the sun tho. haha. so that was why we came really late. at about 4pm when the sun wasnt scorching hot anymore. and to our surprise, mary, aaron, zan and ayid was there! what a coincidence! but they left earlier than us, so it was only me and sawah left for the night.
it was such a beautiful night.. no one else was around. so it felt like the whole beach was ours. we watched the sunset and then made my way to the water. laid on water looking up to the dark sky watching the stars twinkle for about 30minutes. and then continued to lie down on land while listening to good music, singing our hearts out and watching the stars. to my surprise, i saw shooting stars!! it happened three times! that was my first encounter EVER. it was GORGEOUS. GORGEOUS. GORGEOUS. no words can describe how GORGEOUS it was.
we made our move at 10 and again, got the toilet to ourselves. somehow it felt like it was the greatest shower ever! lol.
we got SO DAMN hungry. so we bought pasta from 7-11 which ironically, tasted like the best meal ever too!
and to complete the beautiful night.. got to talk you. ;) thanks for calling.
Fallen.
Head over heels.
I've fallen.
In love with you.
I've fallen...
smiled at 3:44 PM
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
yesterday, monday, deepavali ph, went to sentosa with friends.. it was really nice. weather was great.. here are the pictures..
okay feel kinda numb now.. but im okay.. have a good week..
smiled at 2:23 AM
Sunday, October 26, 2008
okay my previous entry? HAHAHHAHA. i was feeling so down down below. i was so down i talked to myself for half an hour. kecoh. yeah i was lying on my bed and i just said out whatever that was in my head. and the thing is, i dont even know why on earth was i so down? lol. merepek lah kau rosalina.now? now im absolutely FINE.
flea. fly. flo. fun!
it was just okay. not that great for stall holders. but great for shoppers! there were SO many pretty stuff! i didnt dare to walk around. i know i'll be sad in the end cos i wont be able to buy anything. im broke! but hoh wells. i bought something from my own stall. HAHAHA. cannot escape from the fact that i love bags. so i grabbed nini's gorgeous bag. she gave me member's discount. LOL.
at the end of it, i dont think i got any money from it. huhuhu. well the rental plus food and transport. rabs. but ITS ALRIGHT. cos i knew it from the start. it was mainly just for fun! and i did have fun!
and right after that, we went to Sup for its 3rd launch. it was okay too..
nyeeehaw!
smiled at 8:36 PM
my heart is speaking. this entry might bore you to the core.
feeling: fucking fat and im about to explode
woke up on the wrong side of the bed today. opened my eyes and the shitty feeling was all over me. my throat is killing me. i can't even talk. when i start to talk, its more like a whisper. hahs.
i was hungry. n there was nothing to eat. so i boiled an egg. and i messed up the kitchen cos i totally forgot all about it. now i have a black egg to eat, a black pot and stove to scrub. damn it.
deary, you have no idea how it feels like when you called me and started crying to me.. it makes me wanna cry too. i feel you.. its okay.. everyone have their sucky days. take a deep breath and try to ignore it. besides, they're not important in your life. you don't have to be too affected by their mean words. totally. chill okay.. if you need someone to talk to, you know i'm just a call away. regardless of time or whatever the situation is, i don't want you to be feeling down all by yourself. whats a gff for? love you, you beautiful soul. yes you are. you just don't know it. and you have mean people around you that's why you don't realize it :) xoxo
for you, i don't know what to say. i can feel the difference now whenever i'm around you. its sad. im sad. i love you only as a friend, brother. and im sorry..
and for you, you're too good to be true. i don't want myself to be lost in my dreams. i need to snap myself back to reality. are you sure? is this even real? maybe yes. maybe no. i don't know..
you, you're too slow. for god sakes, speed up a little bit.
for those who didnt get an sms reply from me. im sorry.. im not able to reply. ya im pathetic. damn.
shut up cricket. you're making me feel like im in a jungle.
eyes closing. head spinning. im outta here.
smiled at 2:11 PM
Friday, October 24, 2008
for maria's sake:here are the pictures of my visit to kampong. nothin much though.
yea im lovin slide.com. its awesome.
nothin much to update. cos havent been doing anything much besides lazin around and eat. whats new?
ok folks, tomorrow i'll be at these two places. bring some buckeroos with you in case something catches your eye at the flea market. you're only allowed to buy stuff from our stall. thank you.
Flea. Fly. Flo. Fun! 25 October 2008, Saturday 1pm - 6pm @ Singapore Conference Hall
And later at night, I'll see you at Sup.
smiled at 4:46 PM
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
i woke up this morning feeling so sad. cos yesterday night i dreamt of my ex boyfriend.. n then i realise, i kinda miss him. yes. the same one i blogged about before. the only ex bf.not that i've not moved on. i have. but, well he was my first love. and like salwah said, 'first cut is the deepest'. sheesh..
but no way, i didnt want that sucky feeling to haunt me the whole day. i switched my mind to think about something else. about something that'll make me happy. and of course i would think of my recent days spent with my closest friends. its been hella great!
i use to say there was a point of time when i ever asked myself
'when was the last time that i didnt cry in a day?'
now, i can ask myself
'when on earth was the last time i cried?!"
okaylah it was yesterday night. but thats only because i watched this youtube video of this woman in labor. it looked so painful she was trying her best and then finally the baby pop out. it was such a beautiful moment i cried. LOL.
anyways back to today, so i was thinking thinking and then i was reminded of the chalet we went the other day. i totally laughed out loud when i remember i was 'feeling kuat' i started to carry people. including AARON. probably the heaviest dude in pokaywak history. LOL LOL LOL.
smiled at 12:16 PM
Monday, October 20, 2008
as promised, here are the pictures! i am so outdated. i was figuring out on how do i show so many pictures without occupying too much space in my blog. so i tried out slide.com for the first time. HAHAHAHA. okay here goes!last wednesday, chilled at aaron's friend new cafe wit nini and the boys. not many pictures loh.
thursday Motley Crue!
saturday jalan raya!
so today, i went to kota tinggi to visit my uncle and his family. i dont really have a kampong so this is the only chance i get to see 'kampong' for raya. i took a few pictures i will post it soon. tak habes2.
smiled at 2:20 AM
Sunday, October 19, 2008
alrighty. REWIND.last wednesday, me and salwah went to the Singapore Flyer!! woohoo. it was our first time! the view was great. i got to see singapore's town area from like so high above. we took lotsa pictures. but im not able to upload it yet cos my dad kept the cable in a 'extremely safe place'. but he himself dont remember where it is. so typical of him. lol.
thursday, i went for Motley Crue's concert!! HELL YEAH. it was awesome! seriously my vocab sucks so the best word i can think of is, AWESOME. i rocked it out like nobody's business. i dont give a damn about what ppl standing around me think of me. i enjoyed their music. i loved them. i had great fun jumping, headbanging, screaming, singing or whatever its called. I LOVED IT SO MUCH. and at the end of the show Tommy Lee gave me a kiss. :D
well, yeah not just me. the whole friggin crowd! BOO-HOO!
friday, cleaned my room like a mad dog AGAIN. IM SO PISSED. my room gets dusty so easily and IM TIRED OF CLEANING AND CLEANING. heesh. the pile of dirty laundry which was like mount everest is now better. tsk tsk. me and my laundry problem.
saturday! went jalan raya with my beloved friends. we had LOTS AND LOTS of fun. i laughed so much until my jaw got cramped for awhile. ohmygawwwd.. you psychedelics..
i hope i will be able to post pictures for all those things i did on my next entry. :D
hah... right now im having a great time bumming with my friends around me.. next week, im gonna have to sit down and start some SERIOUS job hunting. DAYYM.
sometimes im sad. right now im happy.. i will be sad again.. and then im sure i'll be happy again.. what a rollercoaster ride life is!
smiled at 2:09 AM
Thursday, October 16, 2008
WE ARE WE ARE THE SAINTS, WE SIGNED OUR LIVES AWAY.DOESNT MATTER WHAT YOU THINK, WE'RE GONNA DO IT ANYWAY.
WE ARE WE ARE THE SAINTS, ONE DAY YOU WILL CONFESS.
AND PRAY TO THE SAINTS, OF LOS ANGELES!
LIKE WOO-HOO!
Motley Crue will be right in front of my eyes in a few friggin hours!
i am so freakin excited! oh tommy lee~ forget pam
I AGREE WITH YOU TOMMY.
smiled at 2:11 PM
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
im now at maria's place. we're going through her drawer filled with MANY MANY MANY historical stuff. and we just cant stop laughing at the things we've found. EVERYTHING. diaries from primary school to secondary school. autograph books and pictures. examples:Primary School
here are some rules that she set for those who wants to write on her autograph book
Rulz
1) Do not write untidily.
2) If lost please pay $8.90.
3) Please write down your concept.
4) Please share with secrets by folding the side.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH.
its the rule. so they did state their 'concept' even if i bet they dont have any:
name: surya
concept: blader
name: mohd hafiz
concept: skater
name: rizki
concept: cycler
HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA. what the eff is a cycler?
Hafiza's (maria's bestfriend then) biodata includes a poem for maria:
anak rusa nani
baru kembang ekor
apa salah Rizki
maria tidak tegur
"sorry just joking"
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH.
okay another poem for maria from nurashikin (a schoolmate):
no poem, no poem
them all, them all
i dono with class are
you i thing you with Hafiza
HAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHA. WHAT THE EFF?
Secondary School
ok guess who's biodata this is:
fav hanging out place: Raihani's house
kakak angkat: kak hannah, kak mardiana, kak raudha, kak zariah, kak irah
abang angkat: haramain
clue:
best pal: hani, linda, siti, faezah, maria, dina
close pal: azreena, salina, farah, nurulhuda, hazwani, aini, hanim
okay so i came in only second under her close pals. now she's like a soulmate. so i think you should know now who this is with a list of kakak angkats back then.
HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAH.
faezah's biodata:
the only part worth showing is
fav brand: quicksilver, billabong, adidas, nike, rip curl, fubu
FUBU SEH.
HAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA.
smiled at 5:34 PM
Saturday, October 11, 2008
whoaaw. i cant remember how many times i attempted to update my blog. i always ended up doing something else. heeesh. how can i do this its my daily rantings i MUST update or else in the future, i'd forget how my life was spent!okay so i have been EXTREMELY busy with raya/eid. i've been visiting one house after another. and people have been visiting my house too. it felt like it was just yesterday i had 'open house' on last saturday. and its the weekends again tomorrow! gee.
here are some pictures. kinda boring shots. cos no one seem to bother about taking pictures anymore. except me. so my face is not in most of the pictures! grr.
Irfan's first Eid in his life! looking handsome in Baju Kurung and Samping. his aunt looking ala ala manis wanita anggun. thank you.
the boss and my two sisters
Reds: my mom, my dad, yours truly, kak nana, kak wati
my beloved mommy and my most hated double chin.
some of my relatives.
Mommy's mat rep shot.
SERIOUSLY. THIS YEAR RAYA IS THE MOST MALAS EVER. MY BAJU IS NOT EVEN CLOSE TO NICE. AND I DIDNT DO ANYTHING TO MY HAIR, I JUST PUT ON MY DAILY NORMAL MAKE UP. I DONT EVEN HAVE ACCESORIES. SOMETHING IS REALLY WRONG WITH ME. HAHAHA.
jalan raya with my set of friends will be done next weekend. i look forward to it. my few other set of friends, i dont know if its even possible cos no one seems to be planning?
i actually have houses to go to tomorrow but i just dont feel like going. anyway its not family or anything. its just my sister's friends that im not that close to. its okay that i dont go right?
tomorrow i feel like doing something not raya related. the plan is to spend my day with 'boyfriend' aka 'soulmate'. cos my other girlfriends will be busy with their own plans. singles day out ah konon. LOL.
EH SATU MACAM PUNYE MALAS NAK BLOG. SUDAHLAH BYE.
smiled at 4:20 AM
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
its hari raya! Selamat Hari Raya /Eid Mubarak to all my friends and to those who's reading this. :Dso what did i do today? the last day of fasting? well i just had to help my mom cook LOTS of stuff for the last iftar and raya tomorrow. my sister was in charge of cutting vegetable. and i was in charge of meat.
i cut 2kgs each of chicken, beef, lungs(i think. ala paru la), sotong, prawns, also tofu tempeh. oh god the list goes on. i dunno why im listing it lol. now my back hurts.. eeeks. why so much food? cos we'll distribute off some food to our neighbours and the older relatives tomorrow.
mommy is superb! she started cooking at about 4pm and she cooked like 7 dishes in total by 7pm! and im talking about massive cooking with large pots and pans! we got to sit and iftar together.. wow mommy. thank you..
here's what mommy cooked:
ketupat, lepat, lodeh, serunding, beef sate, sambal goreng, sambal sotong, ayam masak merah. the usual food you'll find in malay houses on hari raya..
ok im going to sleep and wake up early for tomorrow.. :D i hope i'll look good with my ugly baju kebaya. yeah i designed it and asked my tailor to sew it for me. i dont really like the result.. i so cant be a fashion designer. its not in me at all. lol
oh yes, to my dear friend lyas, who's on his way to new york, have a safe trip yea.. first day of eid and you have to go.. :( and its also sad that you have to leave your two beautiful cats behind. dont forget them okay. seriously they're gorgeous.
smiled at 4:19 AM
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